


In Your Heart

by SapphireSiren



Category: Tales of the Abyss
Genre: Gen, One-Sided Relationship, Spoilers, and jade/gelda isn't really a huge thing, there's jade/luke if you squint
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-09
Updated: 2013-07-09
Packaged: 2017-12-18 05:30:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/876157
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SapphireSiren/pseuds/SapphireSiren
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At the end, Jade's desire is granted, and he finally has the weapon he needs thanks to a spirit from his past.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Your Heart

**Author's Note:**

> This fic was based on a picture that I found of Gelda and Jade. It was really sweet and heartbreaking, so I decided to write a fic about it. Hope you enjoy! (It's been so long since I've played the game, sob. I hope everyone's in character. orz I apologize for any inaccuracies in game info as well. I would also post the picture, but I don't know the artist. It's on Gelbooru if you guys care to look. I'm sure you'll know what picture it is.)

Jade shoved his hands in his pockets, gripping them tightly into fists. He'd fallen behind the group in Eldrant when they'd gotten to a safer, calmer room. There was a gentle declining stairway with wide steps, and he was lost in thought for just a moment. They could die here. This really could be their last mission, and if they did, Auldrant would die with them. He would never get the chance to truly redeem himself like Luke had.

“You have grown.”

Those three words made him stop on a flight of stairs. No... The hand placed on his head felt so warm and familiar, and he turned his head to look into the warm, smiling face of his childhood professor sitting on the nearby ledge. Jade, not being one of faith, immediately pulled away and backed up, one arm in front of him to draw his spear or cast an arte.

“Jade...” She looked hurt. That face was not the sadistically gleeful one of the replica's he'd created all those years ago. He tightened his fist and clenched his teeth.

“Jade, I'm not a replica. I'm not your enemy.”

“Then what are you? Tell me!” This wasn't good. His emotions were getting out of hand – and where the hell were the rest of them? Had they left him here?!

The woman gave him a wilting look, but slid down from the ledge and stepped away from him, down the stairs. She turned and held her empty hands up, smiling. “Professor Gelda Nebilim. I am her, Jade. Please believe me.”

His arm shook, and he didn't have enough willpower to call forth any fonons. Her face was too convincing.

“That's simply impossible.” He grit his teeth as he spoke. He didn't like having his emotions toyed with, not like this. He had to gain control over himself... “I killed you. Furthermore, why would you be here in a replica of Hod?”

“You called for me,” she answered simply, taking a step closer to him. “You never did believe in spirits, did you, Jade?”

His entire body shook, now.

“I've been watching over you, you know.” She stood close enough for him to reach out and touch her, but he refrained, frozen in his battle stance. “From in here.” She reached out to tap his chest, and he snapped, grabbing her hand, only to grab at the air. She was like a hologram, a projection. He stared at the place where their hands intersected with wide eyes. “That was the one thing you never understood: the soul. The heart. It's why you say you don't understand death, isn't it? You shun any understanding of your own heart. It's why you fear me right now.”

His haunted eyes turned to her face, and he felt much like the young boy he had been when he'd first began taking her lessons. She had always understood far too well, read right into his heart, and he'd admired that.

“I'm in all of your hearts. Yours, Saphir's, Franz's--” She gave him a look that said she knew. “--and Nephry's. It's saddened me to see what's happened to Saphir. And to you... You're trying so hard.”

He fell to his knees in front of her. If his eyes had still worked the way they should have, he would have cried. “P-Professor... I'm... I'm sorry. I'm sorry, that night. I had only wanted to--” His throat tightened, and he couldn't say any more. Gelda just smiled and knelt with him, curling her arms around his shoulders. It was a strange sensation, being able to both feel and not feel her. He lifted his arms to carefully place them around her without going through her body. He could almost feel her form like this, the warm coat she always wore.

“No more. Don't blame yourself anymore, Jade, that's enough. I never did. I never blamed you. You were a child.” She shushed him, a hand running over his hair. “A child who never had the right guidance, who had already been through tragedy. I'm only sorry I never realized your empty heart sooner.”

“Professor, it wasn't--”

“ _Jade_. You were a hurt child who didn't know the right way. You thought you were doing the right thing. You know better now... As I've said, you've grown. Don't lose your heart you've found, now. You're fighting because it's the right thing to do, and I will be standing right here beside you the entire time. I've never left your side, Jade.” He shook again, rhythmic, head ducked. She shushed him again gently. “Don't let that heart waver, not even for a moment. That's what _he_ has shown you, isn't it?”

Luke... Luke was the reason he was here, now.

Gelda placed a hand on his cheek, looked into his distraught eyes. “You did not create something of evil, Jade. You created a sword. A sword can be used for many purposes. Think, if you hadn't created replicas, Auldrant likely would have collapsed in on itself, with or without Van Grants. Auldrant has a future because of you and your wonderful friends.” She held him again. “No more thinking that you're to blame for this. You can change. You've seen it in others, haven't you?”

“Professor... I was... horribly selfish when I created fomicry,” he whispered. “It was out of my selfish desire for the forbidden that I...”

“Do you think a completely selfless person exists? Didn't you encourage Princess Natalia about the same silly ideas?” She smiled when she said it, and he blushed and glanced away from her face. “Being selfish allows us to move forward, Jade. You can be selfish and selfless at the same time. Show Van that fomicry is a tool for the bright future, not for his dark world he wants to create. Fomicry is your creation. Take pride in it; don't shove it under the carpet.”

Jade watched her for a moment, suddenly feeling his chest lightened. He hadn't know such a heavy weight had been there. “Professor... Thank you. Thank you for all you've done for me. I... wanted nothing more than to apologize. That was why I replicated you, but... she didn't have your memories. It wasn't the same, and I realized my mistake too late. So many people have died by my hand and indirectly by my research...”

“Then use him as your inspiration. Use me as your motivation. Change. You've seen it done, so do it within yourself. You can do it, Jade. You're not alone.”

Hearing those three words, he could feel that pain in his chest subside. Everyone... understood him, didn't they? At least on some level, they understood and accepted him, despite knowing of his past.

“You're not the only one who has sinned. I, too, have killed many.”

“The Planetary Arte...”

“Yes. Many died that day due to my own errors. I took up residence in Keterburg nearby and resigned from the Oracle Knights in my own shame. I blamed myself... but you four showed me that I have much to be proud for, and much to live for. So... thank you, Jade.”

“I don't feel I did much.”

“Oh? But your passion for research would have inspired anyone, and it has.” She smiled softly. “I can't stay, but I think you have the weapon you need to face Van, now.”

She began to fade from sight, and Jade reached out for her in panic. “No! Not yet, please!” He knew it was illogical, irrational... He had to fight Van, stop the replication of Hod, free Lorelei, but he just wanted a moment more, just a few minutes longer...

“Remember, Jade. I'll be right here.” She tapped his chest again, and when his pained look did not subside, she sighed, gave a good natured smile, and leaned in closer.

“Jade, you're far more human than you give yourself credit for. Please keep fighting.” He could feel it, her lips pressed against his, and –- as much as he hated the turn of phrase –- his heart did indeed soar. “Never lose that side of you, the part of your soul that just wanted to impress me, the part of your heart that loved me so deeply.”

Gelda smiled, and he could have died happy right there. She understood everything, and he could have thrown himself at her feet. In a flash of bubble-like lights, she vanished.

He was being shaken violently, warm hands on his shoulders. “Jade! Jade!!”

Green eyes. Red hair. Luke. He gave a sigh and held his head. His heart was still pounding, and he felt a bit woozy. “I'm fine, Luke. Please stop trying to give me a concussion.”

Luke sighed in relief, and looked back at the rest of the group. Natalia had her mouth covered with her hands in shock; Guy looked tense and ready to run all the way back for help; Tear had a flat expression, but she gripped her staff with a tight fist; and Anise was rummaging through the item bag for all the gels she could find. She gasped when Jade finally snapped out of it.

Jade stood up, steadying himself remarkably well on his shaky legs. “I'm fine, everyone. My apologies for worrying you.”

“Colonel, you collapsed all of a sudden, and you were out of it for a good minute or so!” Anise explained, holding her head.

A minute? Surely it must have been longer... Ten. Fifteen? Had none of them seen her...? He glanced over his shoulder to where Gelda had first sat, seeing nothing, and then just shrugging and smiling at the group reassuringly. “What can I say? Us old folks have to watch our blood sugar.”

“Then you really should eat a few gels, Colonel! I do believe they contain sugar,” Natalia urged. Guy and Tear looked unimpressed and just gave each other a knowing glance.

Jade took the gels offered up by Anise's eager hands, sighing and chewing on an apple one. Luke had remained quiet this entire time, and Jade looked over to him. He was, shockingly, looking to the platform by the stairs.

“Jade, who was that woman?”

“What woman, Luke?” Guy asked, giving them both strange looks. The girls all looked at each other, confused. Tear finally spoke.

“None of us saw anything. Come on. We need to go.”

“R-Right... You okay, Jade?”

He pushed his glasses up as the party began to walk on. “Yes, for the last time.” He placed a hand on Luke's shoulder. He wasn't able to decipher the look on Jade's face. “Thank you for all you've done for me.”

“Huh?”

“... Don't worry about it. It's not good to be hallucinating, you know!” As Jade walked on and left Luke stunned and annoyed, he spared a glance back to the platform, eyes widening when he saw the woman there again, waving at him.

“Take care of him for me, Luke.” When she vanished for good this time, Luke's jaw dropped. “Nebi--”

“Luke, hurry up.”

“Sorry! Jeez, Tear, I thought I saw something!” He rushed to catch up, falling into step beside Jade. He glanced up at him, taking note of the focused look in his eyes that wasn't there before. Catching his gaze, he grinned, and Jade smiled back.

Their future would be bright.


End file.
